I'm in a good place.
Looking back, I realize that I was caught between a rock and a hard place without even knowing it! I ask myself every day why I am happier. I wonder where this new-found joy came from.
BUT I KNOW.
How could I be so ungrateful. I am blessed.
Perhaps it's that I have seen so many families be ripped apart lately because infidelity, or some other grievance. Perhaps it's that I experienced a couple of days recently keeping watch over more children than just my own. It's having my eyes opened to these other realities, that makes me look at my own life with a smile. There's a beam of light shining down on my days that wasn't there before. Life experience is giving me the maturity to take a step back and look at my life through God's eyes. Life. is. good.
I find that my favorite day of the week is Sunday again! This fills me to the brim with happiness! I can't wait to grab my scripture bag and head out the door. I can't wait to pull out my pen and my highlighter and ponder on the words of the Lord. What was but a tiny flicker of fire in my heart for a couple of years, has now become a growing flame.
My husband loves my children, he's patient with them, he knows when I need a break and he takes initiative. He engages in their life's and wants to be a part of them. They trust him, they love him, I love him.
I love him, and I feel peace when I'm with him. We laugh. We're silly. We talk about life's challenges and life's happiness. He knows I have so many weaknesses. He knows the laundry situation is so-so. He knows I lose my patience and get lost when I'm driving. He knows I'm a terrible cook. He knows all of this and more. BUT he loves me. He listens to me. He knows the right things to say.
Life. Is. Good.
My testimony is growing again, and I'm not doing anything to stop it.
I'm grateful to my Savior for never giving up on me. For staying the course with me for the last few years while I was merely going through the motions of what I knew was right, hoping it would all start to make sense again. AND it does!
It's said that peace is an inner calm and comfort born of the spirit that God gives to His faithful saints. If being faithful awards me with a life of peace and calm, then faithful is what I'll be.
Life. Is. Good.